March 2023 Courage in Action

You may already know about the popular podcast We Can Do Hard Things hosted by best-selling author Glennon Doyle. I was so pleased to learn that on a recent episode of the podcast, the frequent co-host, Amanda Doyle, accurately explained my concept of betrayal blindness. From the podcast transcript:

Amanda Doyle: Okay. So I came across this when I was thinking about you, and I find it fascinating. This woman, Dr. Jennifer Freyd, she discovered and named this phenomenon of betrayal blindness and this idea that you do not allow yourself to see the reality of what is going on. Because if you did, the information would threaten the relationship on which you most depend.

Amanda Doyle: So it’s really logical when you think about it. Some ways you can berate yourself like, how did I not accept that? But if the person who betrays you is someone on whom you depend, then you essentially need to ignore the betrayal. Because responding to it further threatens your attachment. And if you’re dependent on them, therefore-

Glennon Doyle: You’re right not to.

Betrayal blindness is a key concept in Courage’s Knowledge Base. It is the unawareness, not-knowing, and forgetting of betrayal traumas. Victims, perpetrators, and witnesses may display betrayal blindness, often without realizing they are doing so, in order to preserve the relationships, institutions, and social systems on which they depend. Betrayal blindness is part of why institutional betrayal persists.

Having betrayal blindness explained on We Can Do Hard Things is a step toward awareness and, consistent with our mission to generate and disseminate knowledge, an important step toward institutional courage.

Jennifer Joy Freyd, PhD
Founder and President
Center for Institutional Courage